Return to Sesame Street!

A while back you posted a horror-splash about a the terror that a hyper-realistic Sesame Street would be. I’d like to see this world reconciled back into the treasured childhood series, rather than as a grim-dark reboot. After the adrenaline-fueled shock wears off, have your protagonist step back, take a deep breath, and realize they’re not really scary at all. I realize this may be a bit specific, but for my peace-of-mind, and that of everyone who grew up on the Street, could you please consider it?

[AN: True horror is the normal gone wrong. Disturbing is, evidently, one’s childhood icons taken to realistic and horrific depths. Original post is here]

(#00574 - A199:)

Big Bird deliberately didn’t move from his nest. The stranger was very scared. He lowered his voice to a murmur and hunkered as small as he could get in his nest.

“It’s okay,” he soothed. “You’re new here. You aren’t used to how things are.”

Squeaking noises and sad attempts to dig through fence palings and bricks with his shoulder blades.

“It’s okay to be scared,” cooed Big Bird. “I get scared of lots of things. That’s why I asked Mister Looper to keep the light above his shop on for me.”

“…hooper…” squeaked the stranger.

“Beg pardon?”

“It’s Hooper. Not Looper.”

“That’s right,” big Bird cheered - but made sure to cheer quietly. “I keep messing it up, but it’s okay. One day, I’m going to get it right.” He offered his teddy. “I know you’re scared of me, but Teddy is great for hugs. He’s all soft and there’s no sharp bits.”

“Nah’m good.” Pant pant pant. “Thanks.”

Big Bird put Teddy down on a nearby chair, anyway. Just in case. “The scaredest I ever was? That would have to be the time all the lights went out, all over the city. It was so dark and Miss Nell came and held my hand and showed me the stars and the moon… I could see the whole galaxy, up in the sky.” Big Bird forgot himself and gestured expansively above his head. The man whimpered and Big Bird tucked his wings in again. “I was almost sad when the lights came on again,” he added. “Miss Nell was right… there’s always a light. If you know how to look.”

He’d slumped down into a sitting position in his corner. “What about the other monsters?”

“Other…? Oh, like Mr Snuffleupagus and Grover and Oscar and all the rest?”

Nod.

“They only look scary. I promise they’re all nice. Even Oscar’s nice, in his own way.”

“…they’re so much… sharper… here.” A helpless look upwards. He looked so lonely. “Even you’re… sharper…”

“Sometimes,” said Big Bird, “people need sharp. I bet you have some sharp bits, too. The important part is to only use them when you need to, and not hurt people with them.”

The stranger winced. “Yeah. I’ve hurt people and regretted it.” He got up and took up Teddy from the chair to hug it while he sat there. “Maybe I could stay here a while and learn a few things.”

Big Bird leaned down to whisper, “That’s why all the humans come.”

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