I'm about to bust a record

The official count for all my Instants is a grand one thousand.

Now what famous anthology of tales is close to that? Oh yes. One thousand and one nights.

I won't crow until I beat that record, so you're safe for today. I've been planning on this for the better part of three years. And by crikey, I am going to celebrate.

Not that I have a lot to toss around as gifts because broke as fuck. All I have is my works.

What's your favourite story of mine? Which one would you most like to get for free? That's about all I have.

I mean, I do have about two dozen kazoos lying around, but I can't afford postage to anywhere so that option sucks.

I could run a chance to win priority prompt, but there's not enough time for everyone to compete.

Bleh.

My options are small. And limited to the title of "Suck it, Scheherazade".

Damn it.