How I eat cake and lose weight too

It's not easy and it's not fun, but oh, how the cake is worth it.

I'm currently using a diet app called Easy Diet Diary to keep track of how much I eat, and how many kilojoules I consume. My goal for safe dieting, according to the app, is eight thousand kilojoules.

On an average day, I make it up to around eighty percent of that noise. One slice of cake is roughly a third of my allotted kilojoules.

Therefore, the rest of my day is spent in careful calculation. If I can get to less than sixty percent for all the day [using regular meals, of course] then I can have a slice of cake for dessert.

This involves a surprisingly stable meal plan. Breakfast is cereal or brekky bikkies, lunch is a concoction I call "white guacc"¹, and dinner is light rations so I can has cake.

Not a lot of cake left from my birthday, so this slightly unhealthy shenanigans won't go on for very long.

My plans to do some minor shopping, today, will probably go awry because Brother-in-law is having birthday celebrations. I have no idea when this is happening, so today is bound to be a certain kind of ironic-only fun.

...and I procrastinated my way out of getting even a card as a gift...

Gnurgh...