Challenge #00615 - A250: A Lesson For Humans

Don’t want to have people commenting your sudden bout of suicidal stupidy by taunting murphy?



How about not taunt murphy?

[AN: I did leave instructions on the Submissions box to only pick up to three tags. Otherwise I have to whittle your collection of tags down to three so I can add my own tags. Please remember this when picking tags for your prompts.]

This media was not only old, but it had been played to the point of nearing uselessness before it had been transferred to the Archivaas’ more permanent methods of storage. the sound warbled and wobbled. The pictures occasionally flickered and warped. There were scratches and hair and dirt…

“Humans,” said the narrator. “Are you aware that your behaviour can be disturbing to other cogniscents in the Galactic Alliance?”

“Golly,” said the human on the screen. “I had no idea.” It was plain that this human was being portrayed by a lizard in a bad rubber suit.

“Well that’s why I’m here,” said the narrator. “To give you little tips and guidelines on how to behave now that you’re a recognised Galactic Citizen.”

It started with the simpler do’s and don'ts, and quickly got bizarre.

“Ah-ah-ah, human. That’s a ridiculously dangerous thing to do.”

“But it looks like fun.”

“Let’s think things through, human. If you do that thing, you’re going to hurt yourself and you’re going to be exposed to ridicule and comment for thinking that doing the thing was a good idea in the first place. You don’t want other cogniscents pointing at you and laughing, do you?”

“Gee whillikers, no!”

“So maybe you should think about it. Next time you want to do something that looks like fun… remember that you could be taunting Murphy’s Laws. And we don’t want to taunt Murphy.”

“Thank you for your very important lessons. I’ll try to remember.”

*

Althei blinked as the lights came back on. “This was meant to prevent human incidents?”

“It was an effort,” said her honoured tutor. “And in answer to your next question: no, it didn’t work.”

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