Challenge #00445 - A070: A Little More Complicated

Rule Number One of Computer Repair: Reboot it, dumbarse.



Rule One-A: If rebooting fixed the problem and it doesn’t come back, you didn’t really have a problem.



Rule One-B: If I actually had to tell you to reboot, regardless of whether you had a real problem or not, I’m still charging you for my time. – RecklessPrudence

“…error… error… error…”

Scientists clustered around the tic'ing automaton in clear defiance of all instincts for self-preservation.

“Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on again?”

“Percussive maintenance, that’s the ticket! Give it a good whack!”

“Blinker the blighter! Reduce its field of input.”

“Is robutt, not horse, da?”

“So much for your precision instrument of wonder, eh?” Thadeus laughed loud and long.

Peter stood protectively between all of them and Zero Zero One. Stealing glances at the face of the only one who had mattered. The one who was covering her face with her hands and had almost collapsed into paroxysms of helpless laughter.

This was almost as bad as the Giraffe Incident.

“If you gentlemen would please back away, I can restore my automaton to normal function…”

“All machines respond to a hard reboot,” said Cassius.

“This machine has a memory and I’m currently uncertain as to whether forcing a complete shutdown is tantamount to murder,” growled Peter. At least the others had backed respectably off. Leaving him room to get to Zero Zero One’s cogs and find the loop in its Babbage Thinking Engine.

-clikt-

“…err–ooooohhhhh… Oh Pappy, that weren’t nice…” the automaton ran a skeletal-looking hand over its copper skull.

Peter automatically discouraged the sharp fingers from interfering with its own thought processors. “Let me get your plating back on. There’s a good boy.”

The others had Noticed. There was a general murmuring amongst the Cavulcadium.

Thadeus had gone pale. He knew there was no way he could compete with this.

“Hello,” chirped the automaton. “My name is Rabbit. And this is my Pappy! I got a brother at home, but he ain’t done yet.”

Crap! “Rabbit, this is not what we rehearsed…” he murmured.

“Colonel,” said Fortescue, “Is this going to be a repeat of the Frankenstein Event?”

“Yay! Ya bought my squeeze box! You’re the best Pappy ever!”

“The unfortunate Mister Victor Frankenstein had no sense of personal responsibility in regards to his… creation,” Peter defended. “My automatons, on the other hand - have been programmed with empathy in mind.”

“This goes out to a very special little lady,” said Rabbit. And started to play _There’s Only One Girl in the World For Me_. As the only girl in the room attempted to hide within her fan, her hands, her arms and, when it became too much, under her desk.

He knew he should have waited until he had the entire quartet completed.

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