Challenge #00386 - A021: One Disastrous Afternoon in the Offices of the Cogniscent Rights Commission
Certain dogs, when Uplifted, reverted to certain forms of speech. Pugs, for instance, always tended to sound…..minionish. Sort of Peter Lorre-esque, if you would, but with more lithping. “It’s not a bug, it’s a feature!” proclaimed the first woman to Uplift a dog. "Much more pleasant than the shrill voices of Maltese and Shih Tzus, don’t you think? Not sure what’s up with the poodles - no matter what the size, they sound a lot tougher than you’d think, especially the little ones.“ And pit bull rescuers everywhere rejoiced when Uplifted pit bulls turned out to have mellow, easygoing voices that ran completely against their harsh reputation.
It is common for dog owners to say, ”(S)he thinks (s)he’s people!“ when speaking of their pet. Then came the genetic tinkering fad known as Augmenting. Artificially raising a companion animal to a stage where they were at least cusp-cogniscent and the topic of basic civil rights reared its un-telegenic head.
But periodic enquiries about registered Augments were nothing compared to the legal tangle that was Nufurria.
Pets uplifted to cogniscent status. The Uplifted then interbred with others on Nufurria. Especially their human masters.
But their core traits still remained. They were still dogs. And cats. And horses.
Jenrii summoned a smile for her next client. A cogniscent of Pit Bull descent. All muscles and intimidating, top-heavy bulk. There were scars of old battles all over him, but he sat down as meek as milk.
"What’s your name?”
After twenty aggressive poodles, Jenrii half-expected more snarling, but she got a, “Please, my name is Rough Patch, thank you ma'am,” in the softest, gentlest voice ever possible.
“And what did the humans have you doing on Nufurria?”
Now his voice got smaller. “…theyhadmefightinginapit…”
Humans. The instant they established a monoculture on the planet, technology and society both collapsed into sheer barbarism. “I take it you didn’t like that.”
“No! Sorry. It was horrible. I didn’t want to, and they said they’d kill my pack-mates in front'a me if I didn’t and…” tears fell. Jenrii handed over a box of tissues. “Thank you ma'am.” he mopped his face. “The worse i was, the better things got. Except for the ones I beat.” Sob. “They died. I’m so sorry about that…”
“It’s okay,” soothed Janrii. Inside, she seethed. “You were not in control. You can be in control now, with help?”
His demeanour changed instantly. His tail wagged shyly. “Really? What do I gotta do, please?”
Janrii ran through his current options, which included legal action against his owners and seeking reparations for the families of the dead. Then there was schooling in the very wide range of educational possibilities. Followed by a basic run-through of galactic ally accepted cogniscent rights.
“Please, ma'am? Our… our pups.”
“Yes. What about them?”
“Uplifting… doesn’t breed true. The humans decide which ones… get the treatment. It’s almost torture for the poor babies, but… we don’t like to see them become… just dogs.”
Great. Another legal wrinkle in the already rumpled fabric of justice.
“We have a B'Nari gene consultant team already on staff. If anyone can work out your genes to your satisfaction. I’ll send them a memo and set up an appointment for you and your chosen spouse.”
“Excuse me, ma'am. Does this mean no more tortured babies?”
“Yes, Mr Patch. No more tortured babies. No more… development troubles either. It may take some time, but Uplifts will be recognised as a legitimate cogniscent species.”
He fell across the desk between them and licked her face half off. Janrii had to get used to dog gratitude. There were plenty more to interview, yet.
A whole planet-full.
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